In the 1970s, an American psychologist, Walter Mischel, conducted an experiment with 4-year-olds. He presented them with a marshmallow and told them if they ate it immediately they wouldn’t get another. However, if they waited ‘a few minutes’ (15 in total) while he was out the room, they would receive a second marshmallow to eat when he got back. Two out of three children couldn’t resist and ate the marshmallow before he came back. An interview with Mischel explains it in greater detail: https://youtu.be/0b3SWsjWzdA. This YouTube video shows recent examples of this experiment: https://youtu.be/Yo4WF3cSd9Q
Fourteen years later, he followed up with these children and found an interesting difference between those children who were able to delay their gratification (through self-discipline) for a greater future reward and those that couldn’t wait. Those that were able to resist the immediate gratification:
Before age 4, children’s brains have not yet developed the cognitive ability to delay gratification, but from age 4, this is a skill that should start to develop.
We know that this skill can be taught to children by giving them strategies to help. So, what can you do to help your child to develop the skill of delaying gratification? We have suggested a few strategies you can try (if you don’t do so already):